A Peaceful Pause: A New Approach to Holidays

This weekend, I sat on the couch for Thanksgiving. We didn’t have people over, we didn’t go out to visit with family, and I didn’t even send Happy Thanksgiving to everyone on my phone. I responded to the Thanksgiving messages that I got, and that concluded my holiday celebration. 

I did watch a great Korean drama. I also sat in the hot tub, watched the Lions, and adored my best friend. The past few weeks have been so busy that it was time to slow down, even if only for a few days. During the downtime, I discovered that I have never liked celebrating holidays and have only done so under duress. I decided that from now on, we will do things differently. 

I enjoy my children and my grandchildren. I love being around families laughing and eating. In this new season of life, I enjoy it in small bursts. I enjoy cooking or being with family, not both at the same time. I also have to remain mindful of the lifestyle changes that we make because of health issues. 

All of these caused me to think deeply about my feelings about holidays, how they are traditionally celebrated, and how I would like to celebrate from now on. I have never been a fan of Christmas. It is just too commercial. I don’t feel like a calendar should force me to show my love when it’s cold outside. See, I’m not a Scrooge, and I hate being cold. Also, with my Husband’s COPD, we can’t be around groups of people in an enclosed space.  I am not one to impose my ways on others. The compromise that I have chosen is Christmas in June. I can have my family over for a barbecue. We can eat outside. No one is broke from the traditional celebration. Changing the date of our celebration opens options for how we plan. 

With the new freeness that this group of wayward children has introduced to us. I find myself looking for other ways to live outside of tradition. I don’t think following tradition is a bad thing. It teaches us our history and keeps families close. But at what cost? Are we genuinely learning about our loved ones when we are doing something because it’s how it’s always been done? Is it celebrating if it’s forced?

I have decided that when it comes to voluntary things, I will be true to myself and my family. If I’m not feeling it, I’m opting out. I can love my kids and their kids independently on my own terms. That sounds more like a celebration to me.